It has really been a really really really long time since i last posted anything up on my blog or even write a single letter just for the fun of it. But i guess every once in a while we all will feel like writing something in our lives about the people we know, the things that we do, our activities or interests, or even our thoughts and feelings. But i guess everything has been really different for me ever since i landed in New Zealand; the land of sheep, with the population of sheep exceeding the humans by 10 times. The weather is so dry and cooling, hot at times, windy, rainy..you can pretty much get 4 seasons in a day. Not that i am complaining about the weather, it does not really bother me much, the people are nice too; friendly, ever helpful, many times a bit too nice to believe that it's true. Despite all the things mentioned above, the one thing that really made me feel so different living here in New Zealand is that i am far away from my love ones, and for some, i am further away from them compared to before when i was still sipping coconut fluid with my hands behind the back of my head, lazing on the couch in Melaka. Everything has changed, for better or worse i do not know, but the sudden leap of alteration is slowly creeping up my mind, and i cannot help but wonder if everything will be all right.
I miss my family a lot, but more than that i miss my sunshine or rather Bebe or so i call her tremendously. We started off being quite far away from each other, with her being in UK and me being in Malaysia, but things just gone even farther when i came here. Now that we are 13 hours apart from each other, communication has become more difficult and many times we just feel so helpless and wonder when will we ever have the time to talk and listen to each other. Waking up everyday at 6am to talk to my Bebe is really tiring but it makes me happy to hear her voice every morning before i head for my breakfast and classes. It is always nice to just listen to her and tell her about my day previously right at the start of the day. =) we do not get to talk much but every single seconds of our conversation is precious to me.
My Bebe is pretty, smart and beautiful. If you ask me what i like about her most would most likely be her smile. To me her smile is the most beautiful thing i've ever seen, it always make me smile too. =) If you ask me what i love about her, that would most definitely be everything about her; her good points and also her bad points, basically the whole of her. Ever since coming to New Zealand, I have been missing her a lot, i miss her laughter, i miss her smile, i miss her kisses and her fingers in which fit perfectly into the spaces between mine. I miss the times that we spent together; going about KL and Penang, even walking along the river in Malacca. I could still remember them all very clearly as if it just happened a few seconds ago. But now that we are so far away, it makes me sad at times thinking about the distance and what we will be going through the next 3 years. Life is going to be hard, and love is going to be harder..
I personally am afraid of LDR, but i have always believed that nothing is impossible. And if two person really love each other and want to be together, no matter how far the world can separate them apart, they will still some how make it happen. I guess many times distance actually kill a relationship when both parties let it get into them. They become more and more conscious of the distance, the time difference that is so ever annoying when it comes to communicating and finally they just wind up saying the relationship is not possible and leave. When people actually get to the point of doing so, they are most likely afraid and scared of what is ahead of them, and many times they just run away due to the unforeseen circumstances that they do not want to face. They feel that running away would help them escape the hurt that was about to come, but little do they know that they might be regretting years down the road of that tiny fear that drove them to make the worst mistake of their lives.
So how to get through it ? a simple word : commitment. As much as you love some one in your life it is never enough unless you are committed to loving that same person for as long as you live. And every single day as you gaze upon that very face, your love for her will just keep growing as much as your commitment to the relationship, because you know that that very girl may just very well be the love of your life for as long as your lungs can breathe and heart can beat. Because, when commitment and love sets in, then comes all the effort you two will put in to make the relationship work and everything will be just fine. =)
I love my Bebe and i know she loves me too. =) And i am committed to this relationship and i do not hesitate to say that my love for her indeed is and will continue to grow each and every day even by just the thought of her. Because i know that we may be far right now, but one day we will be near each other, and for as long as we trust and love one another, everything will be just fine. I love you Bebe, more than you ever imagine. =)
Me and my sunshine =)
Me and my Bebe =)
